Viscous Lidocaine

wasn't kidding. still watching soccer, only this time, in chicago!

so, after three days in chicago with the Otherh, i've seen my hotel room, a restaurant, a company picnic where i did an excellent job chatting with the boss & his wife, and i've also been keeping up on my soccer viewing.

but never fear, i shan't take the city for granted.   i am hitting up the art institute tomorrow, and i have the directions for the public transpo, even (not spending ninethousand on a cab), where i shall view art and probably buy a t-shirt to commemorate the experience.  should i find myself falling in love with this city, i just may have to get a job so we could afford to live here.

speaking of affording to live, the Otherh & i are going to move into a house as soon as july 15, which means setting up all that stuff you have to set up to move, but the best part is, the house is directly behind my moth's place, where we've been crashing since feb.   moving  will not be tedious, either, as we have virtually nothing.   we have books. 

i will return to the news and commentary thereupon as soon as england finishes winning the world cup.

england v sweden

ok, the game isn't nearly on yet, and i'm watching the most horrific thing: the news, in an attempt to prove to myself i'm not entirely out of the loop.

what is the deal with rita cosby's voice?  how the fuck did she get a show?  i can barely listen to her promos, i couldn't fathom watching her show. 

so, the news is shitty, and N Korea has a missile they're going to shoot somewhere.  also, fires, floods, and christians talking about jesus in their valedictory speeches.  not to mention tortured and killed soldiers. 

commercials are ridiculous, in general. 

so i just heard that the N Korea thing is because we're paying too much attention to Iran & their nukes.  riiight

ok looking for game now

lots of swedish fans today.    rooney's starting.  ferguson not going to be happy.   i can't get enough of these adidas commercials.    i know i just said commercials are ridiculous.  and they are, like i said, in general.   

do you think that kid jared from subway only eats subway?  id get bored.

england's in red.  delish
my dog just went bonkers
owen's in, sweet.  crouch is on thebench.  england starts with a game of keep-ball.  shit, owen just crawled off the field.  knee.    the otherh says the worst injuries are when no one is around. 
england's on hte run.  lampard's shot wide. 
owen's no good, been stretchered to the locker room, crouch is in.   sweden throw in after a crappy shot.   sweden crosses, no good.    sweden has a corner.  cleared waaay out.
cole to lampard, ball goes out.  england runing.  lampard, low square shot, saved.   england's playing fast.
sweden has a chance at a shot, didn't go.  whistle against sweden.
crouch heads it, but is fouled.   why didn't they play advantage rule?   rooney got it away from three defenders, but one got it back. 
i had olives for lunch.
rio and ashley cole play keep ball, sweden ruins it. 
rooney broke away, was called offsides, but he had the ball onside.
nice takeaway for england again, rooney's shot is stuffed, but england still has possession.  and lampard's header goes wide. 
rio ferdinand bumps it up midfield.  out on terry.  sweden boots it up and out.  ashley cole throwing in.  ball gets way across field fast, carragher has it.  boots it up, cleared by sweden.  sweden running, header goes wiiiide.
england has the ball again, going forward.  joe cole is fab.   ball to crouch goes too high.  going to smoke now.
so, there've been a couplea corners for sweden
there's another one now.   went way long.  heres a shot for england-- right over the crossbar.  but that's like england's 5th shot on.
sweden crosses, another whistle.  free kick sweden.  too far.  england takes off.  where's the ball.  carragher throws in.  nice back heel for joe cole.  ashley cole is fouled.   free kick england.   beckham will take it.  short, headed out, back to beckham.  crouch gets a ball, but heads it nowhere.   rooney denied.  dammit.  throw in goes to sweden, getting toward goal, not really doing it pretty.  sweden fouls, free kick for england just outside the box.  gk looks worried.  beckham for the kick, saved by a punch.  corner for england.   
joe cole is all over the field. 
robinson saves
england running downfield.  beckham to j cole.  sweden hustles, gets ball, boots over halfway line, england gets it back.  carragher crosses,  sweden heads it out, joe cole boots it
SCORE!!
sweden looks like crap.  honestly, and that's not just because i'm bound to root for england. 
joe cole dances.
ball goes out, sweden throw in.
england fans are singing something, i think it's god save the queen.  sweden fouls someone.
oh nevermind, it was hargreaves foul.
defense shuts down ljungberg
joe cole on the run. 
keep ball, england. 
crouch to rooney, rooney stuffed.  damn
another near, booted away by sweden
the announcers are soooo pro-england, it isn't funny.
someone missed the cross.  rooney shoots high. 
lampard outruns a swede, to cole, boots it to robinson in goal, and it comes right back.  and we're in stoppage time.  cole shoots, it goes out off a swede. 
halftime.  walking dog, smoking, commercials, more blather about the u.s. game  (whatever)
so there was just a commercial on for a place that does window tinting, car alarms and stereos, but the stuff they were talking about was plastered across women's chests. 
game on
sweden tries to run, it goes back for england.   england plays some keepball in sweden's half.  long ball by sweden, out on england.   cole swings it in, headed out by sweden.  corner for england.
marcelo balboa thinks this is a good ref, i think he blows.    but the game has been really clean.  no way
sweden scored
there were too many people in the box. 
here comes england. 
i have to focus on cheering.    sweden has another try, off the crossbar. 
england is spending too much time in their half.    wtf?
subs a plenty.  rio is subbed off. 
crouch running, cole striking, it's saved.   i'm losing track.
sweden has another corner. 
way wide, rebound was close, off the crossbar again.  bleh.  going to drink coffee and fret.
my mother is getting very good at cheering for soccer. 
that keeper should've been called for wasting time. 
throw in for england  crouch to campbell to lampard to rooney.  rooney's subbed out, steven gerrard comes on.    sweden plays keepball.  bleh. 
corner for sweden. 
gerrard denies on the line. 
another cross, way far.  corner
beckham gets elbowed.  kick to england.
allback (swe) subbed off.
free kick goes nowhere. 
i think france's and england's jerseys are the best, while i'm here. 
yellow for hargreaves, handball.
free kick to sweden. 
england gets it back.  and the dog got in the way
lampard to lampard to crouch, gerrard, out on sweden, corner for england.
close, but saved.
i honestly have completely lost track of this.  i should maybe sit up. 
there's a free kick for sweden.   straight to england.  handball, sweden.  keeper's taking the kick.
the annoucer is dissin' beckham.  like he hasn't played. 
beautiful cross from j cole, who just got kicked in the balls, over to gerrard who headed it in.
now england is hanging out infront of sweden's goal booting them out.  freddy fouls j cole, gets a card. 
we're up to another corner for sweden
england clears
and sweden scores
in minute 90
so it's a tie.  england wins the group. 

in the other game, paraguay is up by 2-0 over trinidad & tobago. 

blogging soccer

ukraine has scored on a corner, this is big as they are working to be the only team ever to lose by an enormo margin and get out of group.  (onto the round of 16).  american announcers are still crap, talking as though absolutely everything is the most exciting thing to ever happen in a soccer match, and totally favouring one side over the other.   right now saudi arabia's goaltender looks worried, and the field is wet with a promise of rain during the game.    ukraine's defense looks a little thin, admittedly, but they're getting the job done.    it is only 11 minutes into the game.  saudi arabia's defense is scrappy at best. 

another ukraine corner-- way long on the header
another one, same thing.
and another one.  head into the keeper, who wasn't ready, and then someone booted it off the line. 

there's one guy on the ukraine side, if you listen to the announcers.  it's andriy shevchenko.  he plays for chelsea during the season. 

discussion on carding while soccer ensues.  i would agree that there've been too many cards given so far.  it indicates that refs can't control the game, and just throw cards. 

of course i missed the US game (v Italy) because i had to go to sleep, but i understand US tied Italy, which is huge for US, and even played 2 men down because of red cards. 

ukraine's defense is stepping up a little more.

Did you know that whistling is the same as booing?  and booing is cheering in soccer?  applause is positive, yes, but whistles, No Good.  often the person with the most whistles is the ref.  but this ref is good, and i like him.    also, fans will generally sing louder when their team is behind or tied.  until it's over, and then whomever wins just goes nuts.    this group seems to have kazoos, i don't know what that means.

Ukraine scores again.   good ball from the midfield, long range shot by Rebrov, screamer to the low back corner

admittedly sometimes when i don't know the players, soccer can be a little bit lost on me. 

plans

the otherh has bestowed upon me the gift of a laptop compuper.  this means that instead of lazing in front of the world cup, i could blog the whole thing!  because really, i'm useless right now.  i blame having given up cocaine in favour of health, and the fact that it's been oppressively hot for a long time, with a slight break for the rain this morning. 

i will join the Otherh in chicago this week, which is very exciting.  i am plotting and planning where to eat and what to see.  a t-shirt is likely to be purchased, i just don't know wherefrom.

i've mentioned i've got the best dog in america, right?  she just jumped into bed to make sure the laptop wasn't eating me.    today i gave her a bone that was longer than she is tall.  delight.

lazy blogger needs help

help the orange magritte get off the couch and stop watching soccer!!  send as much prozac as you can, OM can't seem to read the papers or write anything other than a very contorted simile.  this condition is serious, exacerbated by the outrageous heat.   

bring iced coffee and prozac.  a lot of prozac.  hurry, the commercials are getting very dull and it isn't getting any cooler.

and for the next month...

i'll be watching the world cup.  today's game, brought to you by coffee & sausage was EnglandvParaguay, going to england 1-0.  this makes the Otherh v. glad.  not suprised, but glad.

abc does this precious thing, as does espn, where they show you the south american team's geography, tell you what it's size is in terms of a US state, and mentions its population & capital.  like, duh.  i knew the capital of equador was quito and i was aware that paraguay's cap is asuncion.  it's also a sad thing that the comentators have to explain those crazy soccer rules.  four.times.a.game. 

go england.    u.s. is an 80-1 shot to make the finals, so i'm rooting for england and iran and watching all the german games.  well, hell, i'll watch most of the games. 

because it's a crapload better than seeing that dead guy's face dead again.  and again. and again.  he's dead, nothing's different, nothing's going to change, stop showing that gruesome thing.   you death mongering horrorshow media.   go show me frank lampard's kick, damn your eyes.  or just frank lampard, for that matter.  and what the fuck is going on with rooney's foot already?  someone.  something.  tell. 

that which we call a rose...

here's an example of bad mental health reporting.  it's the conclusion of an article on the new Label: Intermittent Explosive Disorder.  (is it april fool's day?)

Relief turns to remorse
During a rage attack people often feel a sense of relief, but they mostly feel remorse afterward, Coccaro said. They run a high risk of getting divorced, losing friends, getting into trouble with the law and being fired from jobs, he said.
Anger attacks can be reduced with drug therapy to raise the threshold at which people explode or with cognitive behavioral intervention that teaches people how to relax when they feel tense and how to recognize that another person is not trying to hurt them, Coccaro said.
"The simplest coping skill is to get out of the encounter," he said. "If you feel you're going to explode you just walk away, take a timeout."

Bad, bad temper?  You could have rage disorder.   See what your amygdala is up to when you're angry!

as a multi-labeled mentally ill adult, i find this whole thing slightly ridiculous.    Here's why:

The authors [of new study] said their findings suggest two disturbing trends that will require additional study--that IED is on the increase among teenagers and that it may set the stage for the onset of such other mental conditions as depression and alcoholism. Eight out of 10 people with IED later develop other mental disorders, they found.

So, why aren't we looking at this thing as a precursor to those other mental illnesses?  Because we like labels!   We can't call them spousal abusers, alcoholics or sociopaths!  NO!  they're *ragers*. 

justifying spousal abuse or road rage with a diagnosis is plain beyond the pale.   those things are criminal as far as i know, whether or not they're associated to a disorder.   

i don't stand up with people who say "i did it because i was manic and therefore i should get special dispensation."  i think, manic or not, take responsibility for actions.   i am facing a very depleted bank account because i got heady when the Otherh got paid a fucking lot of money.  i can take shit back, even though it's really nice stuff but whatever i do, i really have to learn.  hearing "let us reverse those charges, but keep the stuff, because we know you were manic,"  is a fantasy pipe dream.  manic, depressed, psychotic, whichever, i have to face up to the fact that numbers add fast.  it's not Shopping Disorder, it's bad math.

the same goes for this, there is no "that's alright" for sheer, unfettered anger.  learn or treat it, quit drinking and for the love of all the tea in china, do not think you're off the hook because you beat up your girl while "raging."

My Mother Does Not Smoke Pot.

Quote of the morning:

"What do you call history when it's in the future?"   said OM's mother, in all seriousness.

an unpopular opinion

NAFTA allows companies just to pick up and move to mexico or canada, right?

why do we not have open borders, so people can do the same thing? 

in preferential treatment, again to corporations, there are open borders.  but not so with actual people.

the EU has it, i'm sorry to say.    Once again, we see the grown-up socialists able to take care of their own without damaging each other.  in fact, i would hazard to say that the EU's openness with each other's citizens (and therefore their own) is a healthier, safer thing than exposing humanity to the Fucking Minutemen.  (also coyotes, barren desserts, etc.)